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Six simple steps to living on your own terms

Reading Time: 3 minutes

Whose life is this anyway?

We spend way too much time worrying about other people. We want to fit in. We want what the other person has. There are plenty of reasons to toe the line, but is it good for us?

Too much time spent worrying about what other people are thinking or doing takes away from your life. You start losing authenticity. Your goals and dreams start looking like everyone else’s. You lose who you are.

It’s time to break out of this cycle. When you live on your terms, you find yourself accomplishing more and being happier in your day. You become more you than you ever were before.

How to do this?

Create a better focus: If you have frequently been in the habit of looking to see what other people are doing, it’s time to shift your attention to you. Forget keeping up with the Joneses. What are your goals for the day? What are you trying to accomplish? What’s the work that needs to be done by your hands? Paying attention to you means you don’t have time to worry about anyone else.

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Weed out your friends list: When you’re busy being worried about what other people think of you, it’s easy to put up with behaviour that isn’t excellent for you to be around. Quite frankly, some people are toxic. These are people who put you down, steal your energy, make you feel bad about yourself and sometimes even hurt you. When you’re true to yourself, you don’t hang around people who hurt you.

Hone your skills: It’s not uncommon to have something that you’re particularly good at. But how often do you indulge in this? Are you using your skills or talents? When you’re true to yourself, this means making frequent use of your gifts and even sharing them with the world.

Forget the money: Do you make decisions based on what will give you the most money? It’s an easy trap to fall into. But, sometimes, we need to do the things that are the most fulfilling rather than those that are the most rewarding financially. Your bank account might not thank you, but your most genuine self will.

Embrace modesty: Rather than wasting time trying to impress other people with your accomplishments, step back. People will notice the results of your work and appreciate it without you pointing it out. You’ll appreciate the compliment more when you’re not fishing for it.

Shine: Most of all, live outside the lines. Be who you are in all your magnificent, fantastic glory. When you embrace who you are, you’re finally living on your terms. It’s a great place to be!

Faith Wood is a novelist and professional speaker who focuses on helping groups and individuals navigate conflict, shift perceptions and improve communications. 

For interview requests, click here.


The opinions expressed by our columnists and contributors are theirs alone and do not inherently or expressly reflect the views of our publication.

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